The Film
by FFcrazy15
Summary: Fr. Mulcahy catches Radar watching a less-than-virtuous movie in the supply room and has a talk about what it really means to be a man. F*LO*C*K 4077 Piece.


Disclaimer: don't own, don't profit, no copyright infringement intended.

**M*A*S*H**

"Holy cow," Radar whispered. "How does she _bend_ like that?"

The video film flickered, and he felt his cheeks blush even redder. Hawkeye had been right; this was a very- ahem, _educational_ film.

Suddenly, the door to the supply room opened, and he scrambled to his feet, hitting the projector and trying to make the film stop._ Please be Hawkeye, please be Hawkeye,_ he thought, his blush now roughly the shade of a tomato.

"Radar?"

_Oh God._

Fr. Mulcahy peered at him, confused. "I was looking for Colonel Potter; have you s-" He stopped when he saw the projector. "Previewing a movie?"

"Um, yeah, it's uh- uh, Godzilla's Bride again, I was making sure it didn't have no splices this time…" He trailed off as the priest walked in and picked up the reel.

One glance at the picture told him all he needed to know. "Oh, Radar," he sighed sadly.

The shorter man looked down at his feet, ashamed and embarrassed. Fr. Mulcahy put the reel down and looked at him, trying (and failing) to keep the look of disappointment off his face. "Radar, where did you get this film?" he asked quietly.

"From Hawkeye," he mumbled, hands stuffed in his pockets. "Told me it was educational."

"And you believed him?"

He bit his lip. "No, sir, I didn't."

"You knew it was…?"

"Yeah."

He let out a slow breath through his nose, trying to think of how to handle this. He'd only ever heard of one case like this, during a confession at the CYO. "Sit down, Radar."

He sat down on one of the boxes, not looking the priest in the eyes. Fr. Mulcahy sat down on the other box. "Why did you take that movie if you knew what it was?"

"Because- well because- because I'm a man too, and I've got needs and- and-" He sighed. "I don't know, Father. Because I wanted to, that's all. I wanted to be like the other guys, and since no girl would actually, y'know, I thought this was the next best thing."

"Well first off, being a man doesn't have anything to do with it. Look at B.J., do you think he watches those things?" Radar shook his head. "Because he loves Peggy, his wife. Does that make him not a man?"

"No…" His eyes were still fixed on the ground. "Only Father, I- well I'm not exactly popular with the ladies around here and- and what's the big deal, anyway? It's just a stupid movie."

"It's a bigger deal than you'd think. Radar, look at me." The boy looked up, fear in his eyes. "I'm not here to judge you. I'm not even going to tell anyone what happened."

"You won't?"

"No. But I do want you to listen to me." He hesitated for a moment, and then said, "Radar, when I was your age, my friends and I... we used to watch movies like that."

His eyes went wide. "You?!"

"Me. And no one ever told us it was wrong. Oh, of course we knew it, somewhere deep down, but we ignored our consciences and watched them anyway. Soon it was difficult to stop. It becomes addictive."

"You mean like when we give guys morphine and they can't quit?"

"Very much like that, yes. Now I managed to kick the habit when I came back to the Church, but a few years ago I met up with one of those friends of mine."

"What happened?"

The priest's eyes turned very sad. "His marriage was dying, Radar. He never overcame his addiction. And every time he was with his wife, you know-"

"Oh I do, sir."

"Every time, all he saw were the other women- women he didn't even know." He leaned forward. "I understand how tempting it can be, Radar, but every temptation has two parts, a truth and a lie. Yes, it will give you momentary happiness, but it won't last, and it's not harmless. It could hurt you, and someday hurt your wife. Do you understand what I'm saying?"

He nodded, eyes finding their way to his shoes again. Fr. Mulcahy shook his head, realizing what the boy was thinking. "My son, I'm not angry with you."

"Father, I'm just- well I wish you hadn't caught me. I know you're disappointed. You just don't wanna say it."

"Disappointed?" he repeated. "Well, I- I suppose I am, a little. I won't lie to you, Radar: I have a lot of faith in you."

"Guess I don't deserve it, huh?" he muttered, kicking at the ground.

He gave a small smile and put his hand on Radar's shoulder. "That's not the point of faith. And I do believe in you, Radar. This-" He tapped the reel, "-doesn't change that."

Radar looked up again, this time his face full of hope. "You're really not mad?"

"Really." He looked at Radar with kind, earnest eyes. "For what my opinion counts, I think that a strong sense of goodness and decency has more to do with being a man than how skilled he is at, er, managing the ladies. And someday, a beautiful young woman is going to see that in you and respect you for it."

He smiled and ducked his head. "Thanks, Father."

"Now how's about you and me go throw this movie in the minefield?"

He hesitated.

"Radar?"

"Yeah, okay." As he picked up the pile of tape, he asked, "Er, if you don't mind me asking- what do you do about Hawkeye? Like I said, he's the one who had it, and I know it's not the first time."

"Oh yes," the priest said, nodding. "My son, let's just say Hawkeye has helped me make my way around the rosary many-" He looked up at the sky in mild exasperation, "_many_ times."

_Fin_


End file.
